Dear Angelo,

I went to see the movie He's Just Not That Into You. Despite it's fair share of rejection, everyone basically ended up with their match at the end. The movie made me realize (with tears) that I'm really missing out on a basic human comfort - that special someone. I have no idea what it's like to be consistently held, made love to, supported, helped, cared for, devoted to - having that constant. My worst fear is that I'll die alone, without ever experiencing it, and I'm not getting any younger girlfriend. Do you have any advice so my worst fear doesn't come true?

Signed, They're Just Not That Into Me


Dear They're Just Not That Into Me, 

I believe people run on a gas called love. When we have enough of it we're happy, we smile, and we're pleasant to be around. When we don't get enough, we can sink into despair; and then to mask our hurt we may walk around angry like Godzilla, protecting ourselves. We get bitter, cynical, and turn sour on life. We close our hearts to other people, not letting anyone close enough to help. This only serves to keep everyone away, leaving us with even less love.

Too often we live in past and dwell on our pain - who hurt us, what didn’t go right, yearning for things we lost, or don’t have. The solution is to remain emotionally open. In a few words -- self-love and being loving. Ironically, this is what will attract love to you. "Build it and they will come." How? By feeling and expressing love toward yourself and others. So rather than seeking something you don’t have (love), complaining, feeling like a victim, rise above the fear and negativity to be the love the want. Give away love and watch miracles happen.
 
Yes, it's a challenge. Yet no matter how unfair life has treated you, you’ll notice that if you point your mind in the right direction, you’ll change your experience. Focus not so much on what happened to you, but on what you're going to do with it. Have a life purpose like creating love. Expect that good things are coming to pass. Concentrate on optimism (love is on the way), your dreams (this is the year I will find my love), the good people (I will be at the right place at the right time to cross paths with the right person), and good things yet to come (my love is out there I just don't know his name yet). Dissolve blocks by cultivating this hopeful attitude, an open heart, an inner sense of joy, and peace through meditation, yoga, prayer, or other spiritual practice. Your enthusiasm will attract others and your life will turn around.
 
All The Best, Angelo